The Ultimate Guide to Being Happy

One question that I am constantly asked is, “How are you always happy?” My answer is simple: it’s all about perspective. If you have a great perspective on life, it’s so easy to be happy on a daily basis.

Please know that my life is nowhere near perfect. At 23, I currently live with my parents and I’m still on the hunt for my first “big girl” job. Also, I recently started waitressing again because I have about a hundred dollars to my name. I can’t tell you the last time I went shopping or was able to go on vacation, but I am happy. I have a roof over my head, food in my stomach, a lot of people who care about me, I’m doing what I need to move forward with my life, and I have a future that is going to be a billion times better than the present.

Here is some of the best advice I can offer about being happy:

Accept that people are different. People are different in so many ways.  Some people are skinnier than others while some people are bigger. Some people are religious while others are atheists. Same goes to politics, race, gender, the clothes people wear, etc. How people keep forgetting this is beyond me. It makes me want to puke that people hate one another because of their different opinions and beliefs. Accept it and move forward.

For example, I don’t like the color orange. I think it’s a gross color. Does that mean it’s okay to not like someone because orange is their favorite color? No. Should I call them degrading names and tell them they are wrong because I don’t like orange and they do? No. Does their liking of orange have anything to do directly with me? No. If someone likes orange, does that define who that person is? Absolutely not. See what I’m getting at? So stop slut shaming, gender shaming, sexual orientation shaming, fat/skinny shaming, race shaming, you name it. Stop it. Once you accept that people look, think, and believe differently, life becomes a lot easier.

Stop comparing yourself to others. All of my friends are engaged except for me. Some of my friends have already started their dream career. One of my best friends is spending her summer in Hawaii. I used to be extremely jealous that I didn’t have a ring on my finger, the love of my life by my side, land a job, etc. Boo hoo, right? It didn’t take long to realize how ridiculous I sounded. I can have all of that stuff too; when the time comes. Instead of being jealous, how about being happy for my friends?! I suggest you do the same!

Get rid of the negative people in your life. The only thing that a Debbie Downer is good at is bringing people down. You don’t need that in your life. For example, does your Facebook have a lot of daily complainers? Turn off their notifications. Or, say you have a long day at work ahead of you. If you or your co-workers are complaining the entire time, work is going to go even slower. Be the person to lighten things up and inspire them to cheer up. “Time flies when you’re having fun,” so make it a good day!

Do more of what you love and dedicate time to it. Make time for the things you love. Don’t get caught up in working 24/7. Dedicate a small amount of time each day to something you like. If that’s taking away too much time, try once a week. Dedicate Saturday mornings to going kayaking. Or take up a painting class every Thursday night. I’ve started playing the piano again, and let me tell you…it’s amazing! Doing this will make you question why you stopped in the first place!

Become an opti-realist. There is nothing wrong with being optimistic about something. However, you need a good amount of realism in your life to balance being happy. For example, you want to become a graphic designer but you have never created anything. That being said, you apply for an open position at your favorite company that you’ve dreamed of working at. It’s great that you have this dream; but, are you really going to get the job? Make sure you are doing what you need to do in order to get where you want to be!

Explore. Try something new. Doesn’t matter if it’s food, a new reading spot, or a new place to travel. By trying new things, it keeps life interesting!

Axel (my fur nephew) and I are happy campers!

Accept who you are and own it! There are some things in this world that you cannot change about yourself. My one eye is slightly smaller than the other. My laugh turns into a cackle if something is really funny. I trip up the steps but never down them. I crack up at my own jokes. Really awkward things happen to me and I can’t do anything but laugh. Five years ago, I was humiliated by these things. Today, I wouldn’t change these things about myself for the world. Know who you are and fall in love with yourself. You’ll sleep in peace at night and wake up on the right side of the bed in the morning!

If you do these things, I promise you will have happier days! Not every day is going to be filled with rainbows and sunshine. Keep an open mind, accept that life happens, and move forward.

Don’t forget, “Today’s a good day to have a great day!”

-T

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Weight…Should I Be Mad?

In a recent post, I have talked about dating and how you should get back into the dating field. It’s exciting, it’s a fun experience, it’s something new. It’s great, it really is. However, I currently experienced something that I don’t know whether or not I should feel the way I do. I’ve had great dates since I got back in the dating field, but due to distance, being occupied with trying to find a job and other reasons, I have not been fully interested in dating. Looking back at my last date, it left me frustrated with men. Not all men, but some. Let me explain.

Dating while in college can be tricky. There’s so many guys on campus that you see every day, but you don’t know their relationship status. Being too shy to approach these campus cuties, I decided to try online dating. Plus, I wanted to date older guys. I downloaded Plenty of Fish, OkCupid, and the notorious Tinder. (Not all at once, that would have made me go insane!) I’ve met great guys on all three. However, my Tinder date was the last date I went on.

While swiping through a collection of all sorts of guys, I found one that I was very interested in. His name was Tom (not really, but for the sake of confidentiality, that’s what we’re going to call him.) He was tall, handsome, interested in literature and art like I am, and most importantly, he wasn’t looking for a one-night stand. So I swiped right. And guess what? We matched!

We talked every single day for about a month before we decided to meet each other. I got a really vibe from him. We held intellectual conversations about our favorite books, we had similar interests in music, and we talked for hours about art. He even sent good morning and good night texts. Match made in heaven, right? Next thing you know, we made plans for a date.

Our date was your typical first date… We went for dinner and a movie. Dinner was at La Fontana in Bloomsburg, and the movie was about a hotel. During our date, we continued having intellectual conversations, learned we had the same sense of humor, and never shut up the entire time we were together.

You’re probably wondering what ticked me off, right?

After our date, Tom opened the car door for me, hugged me goodbye and told me to expect another date soon. I was so excited! However, days went by and I didn’t hear a word from him. I could not figure out why he didn’t want to talk to me anymore. We just had the best date and now there was nothing but silence.

Nothing until last night. Tom finally responded, apologizing for not returning any of my messages. He also informed me of why he didn’t want to talk to me anymore. Reason being? Because I was “a little bigger than what he expected.” Are you kidding me?

I am not fat, but I am a woman with curves. I have an hour-glass figure that I am not ashamed of it. I wear clothes that fit and that compliment my body. I look exactly how a woman is supposed to look.

Does Tom know that I eat healthy and exercise every other day? No, and that should not be something you have to tell someone or explain to them. I look at myself every single day. I know what I look like. I’m not thrilled with it, but I’m working on it. 

What did he expect me to do? Write in my about me section warning men that I am curvy and a little bigger than the average woman? I’m sorry, but that is messed up.

Tom was 6’2, very skinny, had short blond, spiky hair, who used to have gauges in his ears. Besides his height, Tom did not fit my dream requirements for my perfect man. However, I’m able to look past all of that, see him for who he really is, accept him and move on from there. Not once did I think to lose interest in him based on his spiky hairstyle, the holes in his ears, or how skinny he was.

I really thought that he would be able to see past the curves of my body. He didn’t. Instead, he looked right past how well we clicked together, forgot my awesome, witty sense of humor, forgot about our common interests and the hour-long intellectual conversations we’ve had. He forgot all of the good in meSnapchat--6991555501205530572 because of what he saw on the outside.

Now you understand.

Part of me doesn’t want to date until I’m at my ideal size. At the same time though, someone should like you for who you are. Good looks are an added bonus, but it shouldn’t be your main focus.

Should I be mad? Absolutely not! I’m glad Tom and I did not work out.

Tom wasn’t the right guy, but here’s to finding someone who will accept me; curves and all!

(That’s me in the green!)

-T

A little about myself…

Hello there! My name is Tiffany! I am twenty-three years old. I recently graduated Bloomsburg University with a B.A. in English with a minor in Creative Writing. I am obsessed wSnapchat--2151211547123168095ith classic literature. (Jane Eyre is my all time favorite.) Besides reading, I also enjoy playing the piano and painting! Other loves of my life are rainy days, coffee, Disney movies, cats, awkward moments, and anything that involves laughter.

So why am I blogging?

I have a lot to say. I am going to be covering a variety of different subjects. Why? Because I naturally look at things at a different perspective than most people. There’s a lot of negatives in life, but if you look at them at the right angle, there will be a positive! And I fully believe in that. I will be covering anything from personal advice to literature reviews. I also believe in making yourself the best you can be. By creating a blog, I am one step closer towards my own goals! Therefore, the Delightful Daily!

I hope you like my posts and find them helpful! Enjoy!

-T